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Leaving

“I open my eyes
  And look at the floor
  And now I don’t see you
  Anymore.”
    ~ Bauhaus, “Burning from the Inside” from the album Burning from the Inside (1983)

There’s no choice
But getting in
Sitting the stuffy hours
Rifle pointed skyward
Through the roof
Plastic stock firm on my leg
So when I’m at last told to get back out
It leaves a red welt
That’ll last for days
In this strange sweaty environment

Now that they think they’ve dragged me
To this convoluted place
I know no one
Should they fit in
By being square
I’ll do the same
Sure I’ll be conformist too
As best I can
But only on the outside

I’m my own community
Youth and kids and old folks
Males and females
But not on the outside
I see what others don’t
Spirit real or imagined
But not on the outside
I’m a northerner
I don’t live in the place I see
With eyes open
I haven’t gone anywhere
I’m still right here on the farm
Anticipating the next Autumn Leaf Festival
But not on the outside

This will never be home
Home will always be
Not far away
Not distant in space
But right here where I really am
Stranded in time
I’ve never left it
I’ll never accept it as gone
It’s right here
In my soul
That’s all that matters
In my heart
That doesn’t fit in
That’ll always be home
That’ll never be home
That’ll always be home
That’ll never be home
That’ll always

Thanks always returns

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